


Anachronism

by WhaleWishes



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Eventual Sans/Reader, F/M, Gen, Like I'm Talking Slow, Nonbinary Frisk, Slow Build, will add more tags later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-01 21:59:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5222462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhaleWishes/pseuds/WhaleWishes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A human in search of Frisk comes tumbling after them...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is the first fan fiction I've written in about 6 years. First one I've posted in about 8 years. First story on Ao3, period.
> 
> Undertale just makes me feel a lot of things.
> 
> Whatever, let's see how this goes.

They say that when you're about to take a serious tumble, you're supposed to grab whatever you can to slow your descent, relax, and try to land feet first. You recalled these instructions later as you stared up at the skyward cave entrance. Beneath you was a small formation of (now-crushed) golden flowers and above you were stars, bright and twinkling, visible and with little light pollution. You wondering briefly how far you had wandered before you found the scuff marks of small shoes in the dirt, before you had fallen.

You sat up slowly and with a groan. In the near darkness, it was impossible to gauge how far you had fallen. A prickling feeling in the back of your skull informed you that you the odds of surviving a fall like that -especially as unprepared as you were- were slim to none. Another itching feeling suggested that you probably hadn't survived it at all.

Your back hurt as you adjusted your backpack straps. You tottered forward onto your knees, hands scrabbling on the dirt floor, and very slowly dragged yourself to your feet. Upon glancing downward at your scuffed and slightly-bloodied legs, you noted that one of your hiking boots had become untied. All you had wanted to do was get the kid out of the house for a bit, maybe some fresh air...the two of you had successfully done this so many times before. A little hiking, a little picnicking...the mountain was beautiful in the early fall.

"Frisk," you whispered to yourself upon noticing another grouping of crushed flowers beside your own. The kid must have fallen too. The lack of body could only be a good sign, right? You silently thanked whatever guardian angel was watching over the two of you as you surveyed the rest of the cavern.

It had only been two days since Frisk's parents had gone on their yearly "adults-only" vacation. You, having lived next door to the family for a good 20 or so years, were the obvious candidate for babysitting. You were a responsible, hard-working young adult doing your best and for the past five years, they had trusted you. And now this.

"Golly! Are you alright?"

You hesitated before answering, eyes scanning the room. You saw nothing out of the ordinary and certainly nothing capable of speaking. Clearly, you were still rattled from the fall. The too-dim light and screeching headache were also sure to be playing a factor in your disorientation, you reasoned. "I'm fine, thanks," you said anyway.

The voice laughed, a forced, hollow sound. "I'm down here!"

You lowered your eyes to the floor and forced a grin. The flower was as golden as the others, standing proudly in the otherwise crushed patch you had just evacuated. And it was smiling at you. Uneasy, you pulled your dark braid over your shoulder and began to fiddle with it. "Wow, that is _super_ unsettling."

The flower narrowed its eyes and frowned. "Wow, you're pretty rude, huh?"

You took a step backwards and allowed your smile, a painful grimace at this point, to drop into a frown. "And hallucinating, apparently."

"Look," the flower said, dropping the act completely. "You're new to the underground and I was trying to be nice; I can see now that was a mistake. Why don't you come a little closer so we can really get down to business."

"I'm...actually going to _not_ do that, thanks." When you looked down again, the flower's face was entirely different than before. And much less friendly.

"You know what's going on, don't you?" The flower said, fangs gleaming mysteriously in the almost non-existent light of the cavern.

You didn't. "I don't," you said honestly. "I'm going to go," you said also. You shoved off the wall and -being sure to give the flower a wide berth- unclipped the small LED flashlight from your backpack strap. You clicked it once and shone it around the cavern. Upon closer examination of the walls, you quickly decided returning to the surface was not a viable option. You felt yourself losing hope.

"Where do you think you're going?" The flower said, by your feet again although you had moved far away from it only a moment ago. "Don't you know it's rude to walk away from someone when they're trying to talk to you?"

You stumbled away, startled, feet nearly slipping out from under you in the slickness of the cave. You held your hands up in front of you slowly. "Flower, hey..."

"Flowey."

"Flowey..." you said slowly, inching towards the only visible entrance (or exit, as it were) to the chamber. "It was really super, uh..." you grimaced, "okay..." your brain supplied weakly, "-to meet you but I should probably be going...on my way now..."

"What's the rush? You wouldn't happen to be... _looking_ for someone, would you?"

That got your attention for sure. You tried to play it cool, knowing the flower probably had useful information. But how to get that information without giving any info away yourself?

Flowey caught you side-eyeing him and gave the same fanged grin. "Small? Short, brown hair? Striped shirt? Doesn't say much?" He offered, as if reading off a check list.

You felt your stomach churn and the urge to play it cool quickly slipping away.

"You wouldn't happen to be looking for someone like that, would ya, friend?"

"It's possible..." You allowed. Your grip tightened on your flashlight.

"And it's possible," the flower drawled, "that I could have some information you would find very useful. You just have to come a little closer, buddy."

You didn't move.

" _Pal_."

You shook off the jitters -a goofy mess of you flapping your hands about- and slowly lowered yourself to one knee, fingers splayed on the damp floor for balance.

"Golly, friend," Flower said in his cloying voice, the epitome of forced sweetness. "You shouldn't look so nervous; I just want to help." His face was different again, more monstrous with sharp teeth and sunken eyes.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, steeling yourself for...something. There was movement in front of you, a quiet scuffling, a curse, and then nothing. After a moment of continued nothing, you gently cracked an eye open. Flowey was gone.

"Oh, thank God," you breathed, standing up quickly and turning on your heel to leave.

You were worried about Frisk of course, but they were smart and tough and incredibly brave. Sure, the flower probably had known something. But if he wanted to dangle information in front of you -along with a handful of terrifying facial expressions- and then ditch, you sure weren't going to look _that_ gift-horse in the mouth.

In your relief, you didn't even stop to consider that the flower might have been fleeing from something higher on the food chain and a lot more worrisome.

Something that you bumped into -physically, even- as soon as you had turned to leave.


	2. A Helping Hand

To say that you were startled was a huge understatement. You careened backwards -dramatically, some might say- and this time, your feet did slip out from under you. Time slowed down.

The figure caught you easily, one huge, white hand fisted in the front of your henley. "Two in one day," she said softly, pulling you upright and releasing your shirt. Her smile was warm and inviting. "This certainly is a surprise."

"Am I dead?" You asked finally, having entirely lost your cool.

She laughed and it was genuine and melodic. She then caught sight of your expression -frazzled and wide-eyed- and took a step away from you. She cleared her throat sheepishly. "I am sorry," she said, smoothing down her dress. "I did not mean to laugh. You simply caught me off guard." Upon seeing no change in your dismayed expression, she clarified. "No, you are not dead."

Your body sagged, weighed down by both relief and exhaustion.. "And Frisk? Is Frisk okay, too?"

"Frisk...?"

"Brown hair, quiet, about this tall-" here you stopped, gesturing outward from your waist with a single, bruised hand. "They fell down and I'm looking for them."

"Ahh, the child." She perked up a little but her eyes reflected something sad. "They are well."

You wilted further, shoulders slumped and hands on your knees. You inhaled shakily.

There was a brief moment of silence as she allowed you to just breathe. You could feel her looking you over, taking in your bedraggled appearance. If you weren't so completely exhausted, you might have at least had the decency to be self conscious about it.

"You look like you have had a very long day. Are you perhaps ready to go?" She inquired softly.

You nodded once, a long slow dip of your head that instantly made you dizzy.

"Would you like to hold my hand?" She asked patiently, mindful of both your current emotional and physical state and unwilling to push you too far, too fast. "It is a long way back to my home and you look as if you are going to fall over at any time."

You hesitated for only a second before holding out your own hand. When she encased your hand in her own, you instantly felt safer than you had in a long time. You chose not to dwell on this much.

Somewhere along the way, she informed you that her name was Toriel and the place where you had fallen was called The Ruins. She lead you through puzzle after puzzle (all of which she gave a brief and patient explanation of beforehand) and all the while made polite conversation with you between flipping switches and pulling levers. She seemed entirely unperturbed by your glassy-eyed expression and your general lack of feedback. Small creatures skittered away from the two of you as you walked. Your hand was warm and small in her's.

You stopped only twice along the way to her home. Once, when you suddenly felt your chest tighten in panic and you sank against a wall for a few moments to catch your breath. She watched you patiently -and more than a little concerned- and offered you her hand again after you had calmed down.

The second time was when you found an old pair of antlers on the floor and they made a cool clacking sound when you located them with your foot. You insisted on stopping to pick them up because they were "super cool" and Toriel watched you with a tolerant and almost fond expression as you stooped to pick them both up in one hand.

By the time the two of finally reached her house (she had not been kidding when she said that it was a long way back) you felt yourself barely clinging to consciousness. It was a nice house, friendly in appearance, with a huge, gnarled tree out front. When she lead you through the door, you were immediately enveloped in warmth. The smell of something recently baked and very pleasant coiled around you and you inhaled instictively.

Toriel smiled at that, leading you through the foyer and into what you assumed to be the parlor. She sat you down gently in a dining chair (a gentle press of her large hands on your shoulders) and stepped away, pleased. "I am going to get some things," she said, turning to leave the room. "I will be right back."

"I will be right here," you replied softly, your first real response in a good hour or so. You rested your head on the table and breathed deeply. On the way here, your injuries had began to hurt in earnest. The bulk of your backpack was keeping you on the edge of the chair and all at once you were irritated by it. You lifted your hands and tugged at the straps with stiff fingers, grumbling to yourself. You stopped, looking at the blood on your hands and frowning. Surely if it was prominent enough to be under your finger nails and splattered across your palms, it must have gotten on Toriel's soft, white fur also.

"I'm sorry about your hands," you said when she came back. At her confused expression, you awkwardly wiggled your fingers. "Mine are gross so yours are probably gross, too."

"Oh," she replied softly, hovering over your shoulder. She set a steaming mug down in front of you and nodded approvingly when you reached for it. "I am going to have a look at your injuries now, if that is okay."

Your eyes drooped closed as you sipped the drink. The flavors of honey and cinnamon danced across your tongue. "Okay," you answered.

She went to work. She inspected your arms first, ghosting over scratches and torn skin with feather-light touches and pausing between arms to allow you to switch the mug from one hand to the other. She did the same to your legs next and you turned in your chair -slowly and with much effort- moving your legs from under the table so they were extended out in the open. She smiled at that.

You felt your eyelids begin to get heavier as you sipped your drink.

By the time she finally moved to check out your face -which you could only imagine looked as rough as the rest of you- you were beginning to doze. She had one hand resting gently on the side of your face when you finally spoke. "Where's Frisk?" Her hand stiffened on your face and you reached up, covering it with your own and leaning into it. You opened your eyes to see her frowning faintly. "They aren't here, are they?"

"No," she admitted after a moment. Her eyes stared through you, sadly. "I am afraid they left the Ruins not long before I found you." She watched your expression fall and carried on. "I knew immediately upon seeing you that you were in too bad of shape to make it on your own. I have never before seen a human in such bad condition after falling down. You need rest. You will feel better when you wake up and then you will be able to go in search of them."

You wilted in your chair as she went on. You could feel yourself getting more tired as the seconds ticked by and you knew there was nothing you could do about it. "I can't just leave them out there, Toriel..." you murmured. Toriel's name felt strange in your mouth, made even stranger by the buzzing in your ears.

It was quiet for a moment before Toriel spoke again. "There is someone..." she began, a soft rumble that eased some of your despair. "There is someone beyond the door -beyond the exit to the Ruins- that made a promise to me to watch over any human that came through. Please trust me when I say that Frisk will be okay until you are well enough to go after them."

When she removed her hand from your face, you dropped your head onto the table with an indelicate thump. You both winced. "Alright," you said agreeably. You brought one arm up and over to pillow your head. "Okay," you mumbled again. "I'll just...sleep this off real quick and then I'll be...ready to go when I wake up...."

Toriel lowered one large hand onto your head and scratched soothingly with gentle claws. "Thank you," you heard her whisper softly before you closed your eyes.

You wondered what had happened between her and Frisk. You wondered if she came across humans often and how many of them had been as scared as you were. You wondered if Frisk was scared, too. You gave a shaky inhale and abruptly stopped wondering.

You fell asleep to the sound of the crackling fire and Toriel gently scratching your scalp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I somehow accidentally made this chapter longer than the last one.......
> 
> whoops
> 
> either way stuff will actually be happening next chapter i promise. stuff including skeleton brothers and also magic probably


	3. A Farewell/A Puzzling Situation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i tried writing some of this to the undertale soundtrack but as soon as "Home" switched to "Heartache" i started crying and i had to turn it off

Waking up, however, was a much less pleasant experience.

The first thing you were aware of was that everything ached. Your back ached from where you were hunched over the table and your lip hurt when you moved to wipe away the drool that had accumulated there.

One eye was swollen and your legs were stiff. You bounced them a little, experimentally, and were surprised to feel smooth hardwood under your stockinged feet. You wiggled your toes.

"Did you take my boots off while I was sleeping?" You asked aloud, still groggy.

"Yes," you heard Toriel respond, somewhere off to your right.

You turned your head in her direction, blinking slowly as memories began to flood back. You grimaced and lifted your head, willing your vision to focus.

"I am sure you have many questions." Toriel hummed, rising from her reading chair by the fire.

And that was when you saw Toriel for the first time, really saw her. She was massive -standing nearly 7 feet tall- with sharp fangs and small, nubby horns. Her feet were large and covered in white fur like the rest of her, leading up to powerful legs and a wide torso. You raised your eyes to see that she had extended a hand toward you and on reflex, you stiffened.

You saw the corners of her mouth drop as she lowered her hand. Immediately, you scolded yourself. Toriel had helped you out when you were afraid and desperately in need. Toriel had brought you into her own home and had taken care of you, no questions asked. And most importantly, Toriel had watched over Frisk for you while you were busy dicking around and falling down giant holes.

You bit back embarrassment, trying to forget how quickly you'd fallen apart at another being showing you kindness of any sort earlier. You cleared your scratchy throat and looked away in shame. "I'm sorry," you said aloud, bowing your head in apology. "That was very rude of me."

She smiled at that, nodding her head. "Apology very accepted." She then gestured for you to come over to her, beckoning with one huge hand.

You hesitated for only a moment before pushing yourself up from the table with a small groan. You staggered for a second as your foot caught a strap on your backpack but easily righted your body, slapping one hand down on the table to catch yourself. You saw Toriel ease backwards onto her heels again, as if she had be ready to spring to your aid but now trusted that you were capable of making it yourself.

You made it to her with no further incident and she seemed pleased. "Are you feeling any better?"

"Yes," you said honestly. The aches you were feeling now were nothing compared to the awful pain you were feeling yesterday.

"Very good," she said with a smile. "Now...could I interest you in a slice of butterscotch cinnamon pie? We have much to discuss."

"Oh, um, yes please."

You ate your pie in silence as Toriel busied herself with redoing the braid in your hair. She explained everything you wanted to know with as much detail as she could and with no qualms about oversharing. She told you about herself and about the general history of the Underground as you sat on the floor in-front of her reading chair. She told you about the wars of men versus monsters as she picked broken stems and crushed golden flower petals from your hair.

You learned quickly that Toriel, friendly as she was to human children, was not so fond of the adults. Given the snippets that you'd heard of the monsters' history, you understood. Humans had not changed much since the monsters were forced underground but the thought of dousing Toriel's hope for humankind made you frown.

"I am feeling much better about sending you on your way now, but I am afraid you are dressed rather inappropriately for the land that lies beyond the Ruins."

You looked down briefly at your stockinged feet and bare, scuffed legs. "I was dressed appropriately for hiking," you said in explanation with a gentle shrug of your shoulders. A part of you felt that Toriel might be trying to stall. She seemed lonely and the thought alone made you sad.

You watched as she left the room and you pushed yourself up, making your way back to the table and shoving your feet haphazardly into your boots. You felt better, you realized suddenly. Experimentally, you stretched, leaning first to the right and then the left and then kneeling down completely to tie your shoes. Satisfied, you turned and sat in the same dining chair as before, waiting patiently with your legs outstretched.

She came back a moment later with a large coat and a bundle of warm, knit winter gear. "Here we are," she said and she laid the coat across your lap. "It will be large on you, but it will do the trick."

You opened your mouth to protest (it was a really nice coat and nice coats were not cheap) but she waved you off easily. "It is an old coat and not one I am particularly interested in keeping," she said by explanation.

You easily unbuttoned the coat as you rose from your seat. You marveled at how much better your fingers worked now than when you first woke up. You slipped the coat on without difficulty and held out your arms. "Well?" You asked.

It was exactly as she had said; the coat was large. You weren't a small person by any means -height or width-wise- but it still swallowed you. Beneath the coat, your body -sturdy with wide hips and a full waist- became a shapeless lump. Your arms vanished long before the sleeves ended, leaving them to hang awkward and almost childlike at your sides. The hem brushed the back of your scabbed knees.

One corner of her mouth twitched upwards as she assessed the situation. "Well," she said, "it is a start." She handed you mittens next and leaned forward to wrap the scarf around your neck as you slipped them on.

You fumbled for the buttons on the coat for a moment -hindered entirely by your mittens- before Toriel brushed your hands aside and buttoned them up herself, chuckling. You flushed, slightly uncomfortable.

It had been a very long time since anyone had buttoned your coat for you. You found yourself wondering if Toriel had children but thought better of asking.

The large monster placed a gentle hand on your back and bent to pick up your backpack.

You bent quickly, grabbing one strap and pulling it up by the handle before she could. The antlers you had picked up the day before -now attached to the side of your bag with a bit of twine, courtesy of Toriel- clacked loudly in the otherwise silent room. You realized the action was rude immediately and hurriedly looked away, face burning. "Sorry," you said again. "I, um...I can get it. You've done so much already, the least I can do is carry my own bag."

She made a noise like a 'hm' and you felt her fingers flex briefly on your back, obscured almost entirely by the thickness of the coat. "Very well," she said, urging you forward gently.

She lead you back through the foyer and down a friendly-looking flight of steps. It was darker here, colder, a far cry from the bright warmth of Toriel's home. You tightened your grip on your backpack and tried not to frown as Toriel chattered on beside of you.

"Be careful that you are not too trusting." She said, turning her head towards you and easily catching your eye. "Many of the monsters in the Underground are friendly but I am sure you will encounter a few that are much less so. Remember to always be cautious but never unkind."

In the dim light, you could barely make out a door. Your steps faltered for a moment but Toriel pressed on, untroubled.

"If you are feeling weak, eat something and you will instantly feel better. Hydration is also very important." You reached the end of the passage and Toriel turned you gently, placing one hand on each of your shoulders as you faced her. Her lips were turned downward in a delicate frown. "I am afraid this is where I must leave you. Do whatever you must for your friend but please do not forget to care for yourself as well."

Again, you felt uneasy. A soft but very cold breeze whistled under the door as you shifted on your feet. "Of course," you said awkwardly as you found yourself pinned under her gaze. You had already planned on taking care of yourself but the abrupt sincerity of Toriel's words still left you reeling. After a moment of being unable to say anything else, you cleared your throat, embarrassed. You remembered something suddenly. "Oh!" You exclaimed, "here before I go!" You leaned over, fishing around in your backpack for a moment before pulling out your book on first aid. You held it out to her. The cover felt slick under your mittens. "Just in case another human comes through." You said at her puzzled expression. "It's always good to be prepared."

She smiled at that, taking the book from you gingerly and flipping through the pages with large dexterous fingers. "Thank you," Toriel replied softly. "It has been a long time since I have had a new book on my shelves. I am sure this will prove to be very helpful."

You zipped your bag and eased it on, stopping with one hand resting on the door that would lead you to the rest of the Underground. You could feel the cold of it seeping through your mittens The silence stretched on as things were left unsaid.

"Well, Human," Toriel said. "It was very nice to meet you." She made a move as if to reach out to you but checked herself quickly, drawing her hand back and turning back in the direction the two of you had walked. "Good luck," she said without looking at you.

You watched her retreating form and said nothing, thinking how much you were sure to regret it later. You watched her until she turned the corner and was out of sight and then you continued watching. It was only after the footsteps had faded completely and you heard a door open and then close that you allowed yourself to turn back to the matter at hand.

The matter at hand, of course, being a massive door that was guaranteed to take you to Frisk.

Hopefully.

You took a deep breath and steeled yourself before shoving hard on the door. It opened easier than you expected it to and you poked your head in cautiously. After determining that it was safe to continue, you did so. The hallway was darkest towards the door you'd come through and got lighter and colder as you went. By the time you had reached the final door, you could hear the wind howling outside.

If the sudden drop in temperature wasn't enough indication of how miserable you were about to be, the snowflakes swirling under the door were a dead giveaway. You grimaced as the cold chilled your legs, wind whirling around your bare calves and underneath the coat to brush at the your thighs.

Opening this door was harder than the last and you found that you had to lean against it with all your weight before it shifted forward and opened bit-by-bit. A few inches of snow had built up just outside of the entrance and you grimaced, stepping into it with a crunch. Snow and ice were something you avoided as a general rule. You shut the door behind you much easier than you had opened it and turned to face your new surroundings. When you could see nothing but snow and trees, you lowered your face into your mittens and gave a small scream of frustration.

 "HUMAN!"

You lifted your face from your mittens, startled. "Yes?" You were even more startled when you looked up to see... a skeleton. An actual skeleton. And it was just standing there wearing clothes and pointing at you dramatically like that was something skeletons regularly did. "Wow," you said aloud, straightening yourself.

"WOW, INDEED." The skeleton said, moving one hand to place over his chest. It was hard to tell for sure but he seemed pleased. "AND AS AWE-INSPIRING AS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM-"

You raised both hands in front of you, a sort of universal gesture of 'hey man, cool it for a sec' and he broke off, looking vaguely irritated. "Hey, um, _super_ sorry to interrupt but I'm in a big hurry." He shifted his stance, moving one gloved hand to rest on his hip bone. He still looked annoyed but he was listening and that was good enough for you. "Did you maybe see another, smaller human come through here not long ago? Um, striped shirt, brown hair, short?"

The skeleton perked up. "YES!" He said, excitedly. "THAT HUMAN IS MY FRIEND."

"Awesome! Could you maybe-"

"I WAS GOING TO CAPTURE THEM AND TAKE THEM TO THE KING SO HE COULD TAKE THEIR SOUL-"

"I'm sorry, _what_ -"

"BUT I ACCIDENTALLY...MADE FRIENDS WITH THEM...INSTEAD..." here the skeleton trailed off, looking as embarrassed as a skeleton could with no facial muscles to help them emote. He stared down at his boots for a second before looking back up at you with eyes filled with conviction. "YOU'RE MY TICKET TO JOINING THE ROYAL GUARD, NOW. I WON'T ALLOW MYSELF TO FAIL AGAIN."

You took a step back, raising your hands again. "Whoa there, buddy, let's just-"

"I'M GOING TO CAPTURE YOU."

There was a moment of horror when he looked like he was preparing himself to do just that. Then he suddenly stopped, turning away from you completely. "ACTUALLY..." he said, loudly, "I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT THAT I MUST TO DO FIRST."

"Oh, thank god-"

"I HAVE TO RECALLIBRATE MY PUZZLES. I HOPE YOU WILL FIND THEM...MOST CHALLENGING!" And with that and a loud laugh, he was gone, feet pounding in the snow and scarf billowing behind him.

You grimaced. As unsettled as you were by Papyrus -a literal walking skeleton that had easily befriended Frisk but apparently was now determined to capture you- you found the thought of more puzzles downright appalling. You were hoping that after the Ruins, you wouldn't have to deal with them anymore. Unfortunately for you, puzzles seemed to be a reoccurring theme with monsters.

How _awful_.

Fortunately though, the skeleton's puzzles were harmless at best and at the worst, mildly inconvenient. You avoided the invisible electricity maze completely -not even bothering to stop and pick up the orb- but stooped to grab the strange piece of paper laying on the frozen ground in the area after the snowball golf. By now you were very cold. You folded the paper up neatly and tucked it in one of the coat pockets for later. How were you even supposed to complete it if Papyrus didn't leave a pen?

You stopped a few times along the way to examine the empty sentry stations that seemed to litter the path. You wondered who they belonged to and why they were set up in the first place. You also wondered why they were all covered in dog hair but carried on your path with a shrug. Dogs were cool.

Eventually, you stumbled across an even more confusing situation. When you read the note beside a plate of frozen spaghetti and a strange unplugged microwave, you finally cracked a smile. "Oh, Papyrus," you said to yourself. By now, Papyrus had almost completely fallen under the 'mostly harmless' column. _Almost_ completely because you still hadn't let yourself forget about all the talk of capturing you before and how very serious he had seemed about it.

After a very long time of dodging puzzles and stepping over spikes where you could, you finally came across a trap that required participation. And of all things, it was an ice puzzle.

"I'm not doing this one, Papyrus!" You called from across the puzzle. "This is very unsafe!"

"WHAT'S WRONG, HUMAN?" The skeleton yelled back, mirthfully. "YOU LOOK POSITIVELY... _FROZEN_...IN FEAR."

"Oh god," you moaned, bringing one hand up to your face and leaving it there. "Look man, I appreciate your dedication to puzzles. They've all be very impressive so far-"

"YOU HAVEN'T COMPLETED A SINGLE ONE-"

"I was going to complete this one!" You yelled, thrusting a mitten in your pocket to pull out the scrap of paper from earlier. You waved it around above your head. "It's not my fault that you didn't think to leave a pen!"

"WHAT IS _THAT_?" Papyrus screeched, easily bridging the gap that separated his puzzle from the rest of the trail...somehow. It was an action that was less of a leap or jump and more him just lifting off the ground.

You watched curiously -and more than a little fearful- as he made his way to you quickly. His feet were steady on the ice, his movements confident. When he got within arms length, you held the paper out to him. "You're really good at walking on ice," you said lamely.

"I'M REALLY GOOD AT MOST THINGS," he said idly as he snatched the paper from you. "THIS ISN'T EVEN MY PUZZLE," he muttered, exasperated before handing it back. "IT'S MY BROTHER'S PUZZLE AND A LAZY ONE AT THAT."

"Oh." Awkward. You shoved the paper back into your pocket and cleared your throat. "Well then," you said. "Since you're already over here, maybe you wouldn't mind doing this puzzle for me?"

He crossed his arms over his chest plate, unimpressed.

"Please?" You asked, clasping your hands in front of you. "You're so good at puzzles and walking on ice."

His expression softened. "I SUPPOSE I _AM_ GOOD AT BOTH OF THOSE THINGS..." He tapped his foot rapidly for a moment, as if considering his options before shrugging. "OKAY," he said finally. "I WILL SHOW YOU HOW THIS PUZZLE IS DONE."

You breathed a sigh of relief as he went about completing the puzzle for you. He walked competently from one 'X' to the other and you waited, pulling your scarf up and over your mouth. You wondered how long you'd been outside in the snow at this point and how long it took hypothermia or even frostbite to develop.

He stomped on the final button and made his way back to you, as if literally walking on air.

You eyed his feet suspiciously. "Are your feet even touching the ground right now?"

He paused. "NO," the skeleton said after a moment, shamelessly.

"Oh, okay," you replied. You entertained the idea of telling him that not touching the ice at all was probably considered cheating but you kept your mouth closed. He continued to stare at you expectantly.

" _WELL_?" Papyrus finally asked. "AREN'T YOU GOING TO CROSS?"

Your face -already flushed from the bitter cold- went a few shades darker as you looked away. You were thankful that the scarf now covered most of it. "Um," you said, clenching and unclenching your fists at your side uncomfortably, "I'm actually...super afraid of walking on ice..."

"OH." He took a moment to assess the situation before stepping up to the ice and holding out his arm to you. "HAVE NO FEAR, HUMAN. I, THE GREAT AND EXCEPTIONALLY KIND PAPYRUS, WILL ASSIST YOU."

You eyed him suspiciously, hands hovering over his bony forearm. "You're not going to capture me when we get to the other side, are you?"

"NO," he said. "I WILL CAPTURE YOU AT A TIME THAT HAS BEEN PREVIOUSLY AGREED UPON BY BOTH OF US."

You took his arm slowly. The black material of his undershirt was slick under your fingers but his bones were firm and cold. You squeezed experimentally. "Whoa. You're like, _super_ sturdy."

He beamed as he stepped out onto the ice. "THANK YOU FOR NOTICING. I HAVE BEEN TRAINING VERY HARD WITH MY BEST FRIEND UNDYNE AND I ALWAYS DRINK MY MILK!" He dragged you along easily, ignoring your horrified whispers of ' _oh my god_ ' as you kept your feet planted firmly on the ice and clung to his arm. "I'M SO CLOSE TO JOINING THE ROYAL GUARD I CAN ALMOST TASTE IT! THE TASTE IS LIKE POPULARITY AND FRIENDSHIP...IF THOSE WERE THINGS THAT HAD A TASTE."

"Alright, buddy, whoa-" you could feel your feet start to slip out from under you as Papyrus picked up his pace in his excitement. You screeched softly as he continued on, your feet skidding along beside his floating ones.

" _BUDDY_?" He asked loudly, narrowing his eyes at you. "I HOPE YOU ARE NOT BEGINNING TO THINK OF ME AS A FRIEND. BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE...VERY AWKWARD CONSIDERING I MUST TAKE YOU TO THE KING AND EARN MY RIGHTFUL PLACE ON THE ROYAL GUARD."

"Nah, it's just-" you cut yourself off suddenly, a plan quickly unfolding in your mind. You were flooded with sudden confidence. Papyrus had mentioned earlier that he'd made friends with Frisk and that had kept them from being handed over to the king. Maybe if you became his friend that would keep you safe, too? "I mean, yes." You said solemnly, taking one hand off his arm and placing it over your heart. "I'm afraid I've been trying to fight these feelings of... _friendship_...for at least like...a full hour..."

Papyrus flushed, a bright red that tinged his cheekbones and left you wondering how that was even possible. "O-OH?"

You cleared your throat, blushing now also. "Um, yeah," you stepped carefully over the button that triggered the puzzle and placed your other hand back on his arm. "When I first saw you back at the exit of the Ruins, I remember thinking 'wow, that's a really impressive skeleton' and then there were the puzzles," (so _many_ puzzles, oh my god). "And the spaghetti!" You continued, "I mean I'm pretty sure that you didn't set it out for me but it looked like an A+ plate of spaghetti regardless."

"WOWIE," Papyrus said after a moment, face entirely pink now. He looked away from you as he cleared his throat, sounding almost troubled. "YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE EASIER THAN THIS. CATCHING A HUMAN, I MEAN... MY BROTHER REALLY BELIEVES IN ME AND I DON'T WANT TO DISAPPOINT HIM...BUT YOU HUMANS AREN'T AT ALL WHAT I THOUGHT YOU'D BE."

You remained quiet as the two of you crossed the narrow ice bridge, watching him curiously. Suddenly, you felt bad.

"MAYBE I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, SIMPLY AM NOT CUT OUT TO BE A MEMBER OF THE ROYAL GUARD."

You felt something twist in your chest. "Hey man, don't say that. You've been working so hard!" What had started out as simple flattery to get on his good side had quickly morphed into something real, and you were startled to find the thought of the skeleton giving up on his goals downright painful. "And you're doing such a good job. Like, how many humans have you seen in the past 24 hours? Two _entire_ humans? That's incredible!"

The skeleton leapt into the air suddenly with a hoot of joy that startled you. You made a strangled noise and held on tightly to his arm, fingers numb and the tips of your toes barely brushing the ice. You glanced over the side of the narrow walkway and saw nothing but darkness.

"YOU'RE RIGHT! I CAN'T BELIEVE I EVEN DOUBTED MYSELF FOR A SECOND!!!" He clasped one hand over yours, beaming and totally oblivious to your distress. "WOWIE, YOU HUMANS ARE SO GOOD AT FRIENDSHIP!!!"

The two of you reached the end of the walkway and you immediately let go, allowing the snow to break your fall. You took a deep breath, savoring the feeling of solid, non-slick ground under your feet as Papyrus carried on excitedly beside of you. His feet still weren't touching the ground.

"YOU'VE INVIGORATED ME, HUMAN! I'M OFF TO RECALLIBRATE MY FINAL PUZZLE. LAST ONE THERE IS A ROTTEN EGG!!!" He stopped mid stride, one foot ahead of him in the air and his other foot...also in the air. "PLEASE GIVE ME ENOUGH TIME TO GET THERE FIRST. IF YOU SHOWED UP BEFORE I FINISHED, I WOULD BE VERY EMBARRASSED..."

"I will be sure to give you plenty of time," you agreed, raising one thumb in the air. You watched him run off and waited a moment before lowering the scarf from your face and expelling a shaky, fogged breath. You stumbled to your feet and dusted the snow clumps from your coat as you contemplated Papyrus' next puzzle. Wobbling forwards and then backwards again on numb legs, you reached down and attempted to rub some warmth into them. You took one more step backward and gave a startled yell as the snow under your feet gave way and you found yourself falling again.

The hill was huge and how you had missed it was a total mystery. You rolled down it clumsily, shrieking the entire way. When you finally reached the bottom after a few seconds, you allowed yourself to lay there, staring up at the too-bright gray sky of this place. You could feel the snow invading your coat all the way up to your chest and you took a deep breath before forcing yourself into an upright sitting position with a groan.

The creature staring back at you with huge, unsettling eyes was another surprise you hadn't counted on.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have been working 56 hour work weeks lately and I couldn't stop picking at this chapter
> 
> i'm so tired
> 
> also whats proper like etiquette for writing these things. like would it be super weird to give her a name or ?
> 
> also also Papyrus is so hard to write....like how do y'all do it
> 
> also (x3) this chapter was going to be way shorter but i'm pretty sure i promised skeleton bros last chapter?? please enjoy a singular skeleton bro. please


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